Sexist Drinking Games

Everyone loved "Milk." Though Sean Penn's performance was phenomenal, I have to admit that I preferred "Slumdog Millionaire" and "The Reader" to "Milk." (I'm still looking forward to seeing "Doubt," "Revolutionary Road," "Frost/Nixon," "Gran Torino," and "Rachel Getting Married.")

Anyway. I saw "Milk" with three straight guys and my best friend Audrey. The story was moving and the acting was well-done. Though I found the film a bit preachy and predictable, I think it's a powerful piece of art that calls for change, and I wish it had come out before the November Prop 8 vote in California. (An early opening could have just been preaching to the choir, but it likely would have inspired more people to get involved in the cause.)

So where am I going with this?

Last night I was out to dinner with a group of straight guys (and Audrey). In one breath they were talking about enjoying "Milk," in the next, someone suggested we play "Slap a Ho" drinking game later that night -- which involves plastic cups and ping pong balls.

True, "ho" is more of an innocuous term than "fag" or other homophobic terms brought up in "Milk." My friend would never have suggested playing "Slap a Fag" or "Slap a [N-word]" Why then, is it okay to use a derogatory term about women? Its repetitive usage, especially under the influence of alcohol, only makes the term more acceptable to use. (And don't give me bullshit about how a whore is a profession that some women choose. Think for one minute how lucky you, your sister, and your girlfriend are to NOT have to sell their bodies.)

I constantly hear people say: "That's gay..." "He's gay..." "That movie's gay..." The best way to respond in these situations is to ask, "Why is that gay?" or, "Why is it called "Slap a Ho?" I've found that just asking the question has an unbelievable effect and generally leads to a thoughtful discussion -- plus, it's a nicer and more effective way of calling someone out than shrieking "DON'T SAY THAT!"

When you see a movie like "Milk," let it change you. Realize the amount of cruelty that exists in the word in the form of racism, homophobia, xenophobia, and sexism, and choose not to fuel it... even by playing what seems to be a harmless drinking game.